EXCERPT
She picked her luggage up from the front steps and closed the door. She tiptoed on the marble floors from the foyer into the family room where she dropped her garment bag, purse and overnight case on the ottoman. She slid her shoes off and rubbed her feet in the thick plush carpet. It was like walking through heaven. Heaven on earth.
Celia sashayed in the dark to cut on the alarm. Excitement accelerated each step as she bounced up the spiral staircase. Looking down the dark hallway at their doors, she considered checking on her kids first before abruptly dismissing the idea. Khalil took excellent care of their babies. She would talk to them in the morning. Celia unbuttoned her shirt and bit down on her bottom lip as she turned the knob. She envisioned him as she gleefully peeked her head into the room.
Loud grunting noises greeted her. The smile faded as confusion crossed her face. She moved into the room listening harder. Her eyes were unable to focus on her husband in the darkness. Celia stood still adjusting her vision and within seconds she could discern the familiar sounds as sexual moans. Her voice caught in her throat. Her air supply seemed to slowly dwindle. Shock enveloped her body cementing her feet to the carpet, holding her hostage in a horrific movie that she didn’t volunteer for.
Celia could swear she heard a male voice repeatedly calling her husband’s name, but that possibility wasn’t something that she could accept. She forced the lead in her legs to move forward. Her mind determined to see what her heart wouldn’t believe. Celia squinted her eyes at the people lying in her bed. Disrespecting her home. Neither noticed the silhouette hovering next to them. She tried to blink away the reality, as the male voice became much clearer. The name being called was not that of her husband. Dread crept into her brain and seeped through her whole being like a rapidly spreading cancer. Celia voice found words. “Oh my God.”
To her ears it sounded like a whisper, but to Khalil it must have come out loud and clear.
“Celia,” the man she knew as her husband fell from the bed onto the floor with a thud.
She found the strength to hit the lamp button on the nightstand flooding the room with light. She stared at the wall taking in shallow breaths. Celia refused to pass out from being lightheaded.
“Celia?” He called her name again as he sat on the floor covered with the comforter. She couldn’t bring herself to look his way. Instead her eyes locked with another pair of eyes. Eyes that was full of fear. Eyes more familiar than she would like to admit. Yes the same color and shape as hers.
The eyes of her child stared back at her.
Kaleia. Her husband had moaned the name of their thirteen-year-old daughter. The depravity of the situation hit her in the face. She felt like she had just been pimp slapped on a street corner. Too stunned to respond, still unable to believe that her eyes were evidence enough. She scanned the room, while the rest of her body remained motionless and her arms dangled to the sides. A paralyzed being propped up by contradiction.
Her Bedroom.
Her Husband.
Their Daughter.
She visually brushed the ebony wood furniture that sat in its original place. The armoire was still in the left corner next to the sitting area of the bay window. The custom made dresser and mirror was on the sidewall closest to the bed. The original Jacob Lawrence painting centered by candle sconces above the headboard. The warm color of butternut squash covering all the walls, accented the authentic pieces, which she had picked out with Khalil.
This wasn’t happening.
The wails coming from Kaleia slowly broke her trance, replaced numbness with anger as she absorbed the perversity. She needed to get out of this room. Needed to get out of the house. She looked at her offspring and wanted to leave both of them there together, as a disturbed memory, but her motherly instinct wouldn’t allow that.
“Put your clothes on Kaleia” she stated through clenched teeth. Celia closed her eyes and inhaled deeply several times, blowing fury from her nostrils, before taking that first step. She tried to contain the rage building in her system.
Khalil grasped her hand as she strolled by him. “Baby, hear me out,” he pleaded. The fury took over as her leg lifted and the sole of her barefoot made contact with his eye. She reeled her leg back with all her strength and kicked him again. Over and over again she tried to stomp him into the carpet. He put his arm in front of his face to block the blows. She didn’t care. She aimed wherever she saw skin exposed, wishing she still had her pumps on so she could see blood.
“Stop momma. Please stop,” Kaleia screamed. Celia looked up and saw her daughter balled up in the corner of the room with ears covered crying. She was dressed in the Sponge Bob pajamas that Celia had bought her. Pajamas that Kaleia had complained she was too old to wear.
Celia set her foot on the ground determined to compose herself. She looked at the doorway and noticed Caleb staring at her wide-eyes. She wondered how much he had seen. She clutched her open shirt together and calmly said, “Caleb go get your shoes on. We’re leaving.”
“Mom, what’s going on,” he asked his voice shaking.
“Don’t worry about it. I want you to hurry up.”
He nodded and obediently went towards his room glancing back numerous times before he made it to his door.
“Kaleia, you get up and do the same thing.”
Kaleia stayed in the corner with her head between her knees.
“Shoes. Now!” Celia’s voice rose with firmness.
Kaleia stood up and darted eyes from her mother to her father as he laid a crumpled mess by the bed.
Celia waited until Kaleia left the room before sauntering back over Khalil. She bent down next to him as he flinched, expecting her to do more bodily harm. She made sure his eyes matched hers before hissing, “If you ever try to touch me or either of my children again I will kill you. I will take your sick, perverted worthless life without blinking an eye.”
He opened his swollen mouth then closed it again, realizing the severity of her words.
She walked into the hall, taking another deep breath, sucked in air as if she was coming out an inferno of fire. Each step was harder than the last as she went down the stairs after making sure the kids weren’t on the second floor.
Caleb was standing in the family room. Kaleia was sitting on the sofa. Celia reached into her purse and handed Caleb her keys.
“Sweetheart, go start the Jaguar for me and take my overnight case with you.”
His eyes got big. He cautiously asked, “For real. I can get in the driver’s seat of the Jaguar?”
“Do not get too excited. Turn the car on, but don’t leave the driveway.” Her face smiled even though her heart was dying.
“Kaleia.”
The alarm from the security system went off. She lost her train of thought amongst the noise. “Never mind, let’s go.”
Celia waited til Kaleia stood and walked behind her as nausea overcame her. She got to the front door, braced the doorframe. The taste of bile stung her tongue as she regurgitated her turkey sub all over her marble floors. She wiped her mouth with the back of her hand as she noticed Khalil standing at the top of the stairs dressed in the same t-shirt and pajama pants she saw him in the last time she left her home. Celia pulled the door closed on the echo of the alarm and her family’s security.
Both her children were in the backseat when she made it to her Jaguar. The Yolanda Adams ‘Day by Day’ CD was playing. She pushed the off button of the stereo. Shook her head and stared at the three-stall garage before pushing the gear into reverse and backing out.
She didn’t know where she was going as she cruised the quiet streets. She refused to go to family or friends. She wasn’t ready to explain why her and the kids were out in the middle of the night. She drove forty miles to Lake Superior. She often found peace by water. She got out the car and leaned against it as a slight breeze brushed across her face. She capped her mouth with her fingers. Blew out air into her hand. Celia slogged up the pier and stood against the railing, wrapped her fingers around cold metal. Waves crashed on the wall below her. She listened to sounds of the night as the wind howled. Celia gazed at the full moon partially covered by clouds. The sky an oasis of color indicating daybreak was approaching.
The pictures of her husband and her daughter doing unspeakable things in her bed flashed through her mind in instant replay. She tried to block the memories, but the visions remained. She tightened her grip on the railing and looked up into the sky. The first tear dropped from her eyes onto her hand.
“Why me Lord?” She cried allowing tears to freely stream down her face and fall in to the water. The pain so great, she felt her legs would cave from beneath her. Celia’s shoulders heaved up and down as she pleaded for an explanation.
“What did I do to deserve this? I’ve been obedient to you, how did I lose your favor?” She couldn’t imagine this being her life. Not after fifteen good years of marriage. No human being should witness what she had seen. Feel what she was feeling. Unbearable Grief. She cynically laughed at the absurdity of it all. Turned her joy to gloom. She had felt every emotion known to man within a twenty-four hour period.
She waited for an answer that didn’t come. She released the railing and went back to her vehicle gazing at her children before stepping back in. Caleb had fallen asleep. His head was pressed against the window. Kaleia stared straight ahead. Celia wanted to talk to her child, but couldn’t think of anything to help the situation. Was unsure of what would come from her mouth if she started a dialogue. Apart of her wanted to hug Kaleia. Examine her for bruises or marks, anything that would indicate that she didn’t enjoy what Khalil did to her. Celia wanted to make sure she was okay. If it was possible to be okay after something like that. Another part of her was itching to slap her daughter until her fingers went numb. She wanted to shake her. They had talked about sex and Celia thought her daughter was clear about what that involved. Celia wanted to ask her how she could let any boy or any man touch her intimately like that, let alone her own father. Too many emotions were running amok for her to trust herself. She may do more harm than good to the both of them.